Tuesday, September 4, 2007

This Pickle Wasn't Sweet

It was Alissa’s first day of school. She will be in the first grade. She will also be going to school with Austin. The last two years she has gone to a private preschool and kindergarten. They were nurturing and kind to my little princess. So I guess I was expecting too much from this public school, first grade bitch, oops I mean teacher. Most of the teachers here have been fine, this one just pissed me off.

Ms. Valasick sat behind her desk and waited for her new students, and their parents, to come in. She didn’t leave her desk to great us. We walked up to her throne.

“Good morning, we are Mr. and Mrs. Malathionman, this is Alissa.”

If Ben Stein had a sister, she would sound like this, “Hello, I’m Ms. Valasick. Alissa, pick a colored stick from this jar, match it to the colored spot at one of those tables and take a seat. Here is your name tag, please put it on.”

We do as instructed.

Sherri is doing her best to get Alissa excited about class, but things are getting misty in a hurry. As I watch the tears forming in both Sherri and Alissa’s eyes, I can’t help but think this woman could get off her butt and try to make my daughter feel a little more comfortable in her classroom. It didn’t happen. I felt like shit leaving, but Sherri had to go before she really started to cry and that would make things even worse for Alissa.

I made sure I was there when she got out of school. I wanted to see how Ms. Valasick was interacting with the kids, and I wanted to give my little girl a big hug.

I watched as Ms. Valasick let each child out of the classroom. Each child got this option at the door, “High five, handshake, or hug.” Alissa chose hug. It all sounds nice, but with that Ben Stein voice and the going through the motions hug she got, I still wasn’t impressed. I wish “needle in the eye” was an option.


Mocha said...

Oh, I love the "high five, handshake, or hug" thing. It's quite popular. "Needle in the eye" is moving up quickly, though, so keep your fingers crossed.

-S. said...

That last part is actually great. When my youngest was in school, they changed the rules where teachers were not allowed to initiate anytime of physical contact.

I'm sorry the teacher was such a snot at the beginning, but perhaps she is shy?


Queen of Dysfunction said...

Oh no! Don't you wonder how it is that some people chose their professions? It doesn't sound like Ms. Valasick is exactly 1st grade teacher material...

Herself said...

I like everything you write about. It's incredibly varied, from sex toys to parenting. It's one of the few blogs I read regularly.

Guinevere said...

Ahhhh...and Alissa obviously NEEDED a hug. I'm sure your hug was MUCH better. :o)

Maybe the teacher will loosen up after awhile...or the kids will get used to her...or the school year will FLY by! :o)

Leucantha` said...

This is a sweet entry, even if it revolves around a sour pickle. What a sweet daddy. I knew you had a soft side....

OH and I am so glad this entry had nothing to do with the things that ran through my mind when I read the title.