Tuesday, January 30, 2007


… nothing to talk about but puke. I was not selected for a jury today. My civic duty has been served this year. So my post today is about dog vomit.

Last night as I was finishing off another one of my bitchin blog entries, Mia my female dachshund, walks up to the desk and leaves a barf deposit at my feet. Why she thought I needed to partake in its steamy hot goodness I don’t know. There is nothing like that warm feeling in your hand as you clean up fresh dog puke, unless of course your are cleaning up fresh dog diarrhea. That would be later in the night.

Apparently the trouble making brother and sister team of Splinter and Mia had been up to no good earlier in the day. Sherri had informed me that the two of them had some how eaten an entire lemon cake. I would guess Mia had eaten most of it by the size of her belly. Splinter must have knocked it off of the kitchen table, while Mia eagerly waited below. I know this because we have seen Splinter on the kitchen table before. If you leave a chair pulled out just a little, he will be on the tabletop checking things out.
When Sherri had got home from picking up Alissa from school, all that was left of the cake was an empty container on the floor.

It reminds me of the dachshunds in The Ugly Dachshund. I have always had these dogs as pets, and they have always been little troublemakers. That’s probably why I like them so much.


Leucantha` said...

Your title is so appropriate today. I do need my gloves and protective eyewear. Luckily I am here at break time and not at lunch. So you aren't hanging any juries today? Slacker!

Mocha said...

Actually, I was thinking "fresh dog diarrhea" was a better title.

Natalie said...

Oh, those dogs! Lulu can put her paws up on the counter and has perfected the art of eating sideways. Poor, short little Mojo dances around at her feet hoping she spill some onto the floor. We NEVER leave anything on the table as that is fair game.
Last week, Lulu ate half of a cake that was sitting on the BACK of the counter. I really don't know how she reached it. (Tippy-paws?)
We then spent the rest of the evening letting her in and out as she definitely had an upset tummy.
And they know they are being bad, don't they? Lulu gets this look on her face that actually looks like a grimace when she's caught.
Hmm... weener dogs. Never would have taken you for a weener dog kinda guy. Rottweiller, maybe, or Aussie or Border Collie...
I found a Dachshund once. I was at a 7-11 (in ABQ, years ago) and there was a very cute and very pathetic looking little Dachshund sitting near the curb. I thought she'd been hit by a car or something.
I took her home and then called the Humane Society because she had one of their tags on. I thought that she was starving so I offered her some of my freshly roasted, expensive, organic chicken. She took some willingly and wouldn't leave my lap.
About 6 hours later, her owner called me. Her name was Penny and she was an escape artist. She did this every day!! Her owner said she'd thought she barricaded the entire yard but Penny always found a way to get out. And, what a little actress she was, what with all of those "I'm so pathetic" looks.
Her owner came and picked her up, thanked me profusely, and drove off.
About a week later, I saw Penny taking herself for a walk.
Funny dog. And cute as a button.

Malathionman said...

Nat-Dachshunds are just a family tradition. I love all dogs. I love coming home to my kids and dogs.

Chris said...

If they were in 'Nam, Colonel Kilgore would have said "I love the smell of dog vomit in the evening. It smells like victory!"